Babies, don't take them for granted!

I have written and rewritten this particular blog numerous times so I figure I would just get to the point. I recently offered my girlfriend my eggs. Not your run of the mill chicken eggs, no my reproductive eggs. So some of you might be thinking what the? One of my very close girlfriend has been trying to have a baby by IVF for 3 years now with no success. She was 40 when she started her first round of IVF and unfortunately it has never taken. There is nothing physically wrong with her or her partner, her body produces eggs normally and her partner is a perfectly healthy strapping man. But the only thing that they can conclude is that there age means that their eggs and sperm isn’t as strong as they would like it to be. This has not only been heartbreaking to watch but makes you really think about your own life and puts things in perspective.



I am lucky to have 3 amazing nieces and 1 spunky young nephew who I love unconditionally and would do anything for. Now all 4 of these little angels (their parents may say different) coming into this world hasn’t been easy on either them or my sisters. I have lost a niece, I have had to sit with the fact that they thought my sister had a brain tumour in her second pregnancy and had to watch my other sister be so violently ill though her pregnancy and birth that it makes me wonder why I even want kids. But the simple answer to that is the enjoyment that these little ones give not just their parents but my whole family. I love that my nephew thinks my name is Roxy as he has managed to confuse my name with my dog. I love that when they have all learnt my name and say it repeatedly, I love that all my nieces have a crush my fiancé as they always run to him before me. And most of all I love how during really difficult times in my family’s life they make you realise how important family is. When my grandfather died it was unexpected and sudden but 4 months later the beautiful Ava Mackenzie came into the world and was able to take away some of the pain we all felt. I see my sisters with my nieces and nephew and see the joy they give them and the sacrifices they make for them. I’ve seen Kate sit in front of a dryer with Jack watching clothes spin around as that was the only way she could calm Jack down. I have seen Jacqui dances around to wiggles to make her girls smile when their having a moment.



These are the things that make me want to be a parent and I except I could face the problems my sisters face during their pregnancies but I’m willing to do this for a baby of my own. So to sit and watch my closes friends go through this I realise that this is something I can help with. So it doesn’t seen bazaar to me to off someone my eggs as if this means that my girlfriend has a chance at having a child then why not. Now I asked a few people what there thoughts were on this. A few people had said that they would find it hard as to do it for various reasons and these were a few I got. Firstly what if I gave up some of my eggs and my friend has a perfectly healthy child and it came time for me to conceive and I couldn't or I had a child with a deformity. Well that can happen regardless if I have given some of my eggs away or not.

Secondly wouldn't I feel like the baby was mine? Now I don't know if anyone has seen the size of an egg but it's the size of a pin prick I shed hair and eyelashes that are bigger. Yes these don't resolve in a child but it's a very small part of me.

My thoughts on this is once I have given the eggs to my friend and they no longer belong to me. They are hers and her partners and it will grow inside of her, she will nourish it and keep it safe and deliver it when the time comes. This is 10 months worth of work, (The 9 month thing is rubbish 40 weeks equals 10 months) I only participate for a 1/4 of a percent of that and what better gift could I give but the gift of life to them.


Now after some research into me donating my eggs we located a few dramas. Firstly I would have to register that I was a Donor and when the child was 18 years old the child could register on line and find out that I was what they would call the biological mother. So keeping this a secret was out of the question as my friend would have to tell the child. Strange you can adopt a child and never tell them but using donor eggs and sperm mean't you have too! This is something we all didn't feel comfortable about, as the child may never find out that I played a part in their existence but they could and it was a risk that we weren't happy with. Can you imagine if this child found out on their 18th birthday "Oh you are our child but you know your Aunt Dannii it was her eggs that helped us conceive you". Apart of what the physiological damage could be to them I would be in this child's life and it would feel betrayed my not just their parents but by me as well. My strong thoughts are that these laws need to change as parents who go through IVF have the option to donate their eggs for the reproductively challenged. They are doing something for people who have been in the same boat as themselves and can understand it from a point of view a lot of us may not be able to.


So I guess for me to sign off on this blog is Yes I would definitely give my eggs to my girlfriend if were able to do it in a way that we were both comfortable. Cause at the end of the day any of us could be in that situation one day and I would hope that I would have a friend put that offer on the table as a choice I could have. Being a parent is the most selfless thing you can do in your life and I think we should all have the option no matter our age or race.So for all the mothers and fathers out there whenever your child is being a pain and your ready to sell them on ebay, remember there are people out there who aren't as fortunate as you are.

Personal Training, Is It Worth The Cost?

So long gone are the days that personal trainers are just for celebrities. I am lucky that I have a second job that allows me to afford to splash out on a trainer once a week. I have been really lucky that I have had some amazing trainers in my time but I have 2 that stick out in my mind. My first one is the amazing Emma Pilcher, I started to train with Emma at the beginning of the year who I absolutely loved. Emma would work me hard and have a good giggle, Emma is very inspiring and has achieved a lot in her life and has 2 very amazing children. Her husband and her run an amazing personal training business and would highly recommend her and her husband Glen to anyone. I unfortunately had to stop my training in May with Emma as I had lost my job and had to make some cut backs and my personal training was one of them. I still remain close with Emma and love being able to hear about her adventures. So when I started working again I wanted to get back to training, the only thing I needed to go train in the mornings before work and nights no longer suit. I am also unable to train on Saturdays as I work then, as Emma has her little ones I don't want her to be asked to get up for me at 5:30am. So I was thinking who would be able to do this for me? Then I realised there is someone who I know can kick my butt as she does it 2 mornings a week. And that’s the beautiful Amanda Kelly, a couple of reasons I made the decision to go with Amanda is for starters she is the same shape as me, so I know that she will know how my body works. Amanda like Emma has a killer body so that’s a big plus. I also like the way Amanda's teaches classes, I'm always tired and feel like I have had an amazing workout afterwards. So I have now been working with Amanda for about a month now and I'm already seeing a huge difference in my body. I also have come to find myself a new friend in Amanda. She has been very supportive of my goals and hasn’t shied away from me for wanting to achieve them. The thing I also love is she continually kicks my butt and tells me I can do something even when I think I can’t. Especially when I told her I was allergic to chin ups! That excuse hasn’t work and I know I will be doing them soon.

So my question is, is personal trainers worth all the hype. My answer is Yes but the is a but at the end of that. Finding the right trainer is the key, as they are not all the same and some are downright terrible. For example there is a trainer in my gym to bitched to a client that I was going to get a big bum from doing a particular exercise as he saw me do it regularly, problem is she is one of my clients and told me. Now as far as I’m concerned this guy can get stuffed but the problem for our mutual client is that she doesn’t want to go in the weight areas anymore in fear that this trainer will bitch about her. So here are some tips that might help. Look for referrals from people who have them, watch PT’s around your gym and see if you like the way they are training their clients and never be scared to say it’s not working if you have done a few sessions and it doesn’t work or they start bitching about other clients.
Map out the reason you want a trainer and so you can be forward with them when you start, whether it is weight loss, muscle definition or just to mix things up.

So on my second day of cleanse and I am still not well. I am eating food and incorporating my juices through the day, for example I had a light breakfast of some gluten free toast and a small salad for lunch. I drank a juice mid morning and will drink my juices this afternoon and tonight. While this is not ideal for a proper cleanse it’s what I need to do until I start to get better. I find the juices do make me feel full and give me energy as well I will keep doing this through the week and see what kind of weight loss I have on Friday. If I don’t lose the 3kg that was recommended that I would lose I won’t be upset as I know I have done the right thing by my body.

For reccomendations for amazing personal trainers please email me on danielle.banister@gmail.com

Urban Remedy Cleanse

So as I mentioned in last weeks blogs I am doing the Urban Remedy Cleanse this week to help me loose a bit of weight prior to the wedding. I actually got recommended to this product by a few people who have done it and had great success. So I had seen a lot of positive feedback from the Facebook page and so I posted on the walls what I would like to achieve by doing the cleanse. I got a a prompt response by the beautiful Emma who gave me some info and was even kind enough to come meet with me and discuss what my plans are for weight loss. Emma sat down with me and explained how the cleanses works. What effectively we do on this cleanse is give your digestive system a break for a few days.
Your body is designed to detoxify naturally. Cleansing helps to accelerate this natural process of neutralising or eliminating toxins from your body for optimum health. An Urban Remedy Cleanse is particularly efficient and effective because it does two things at once:

It floods the body with easily-assimilated nutrients, vitamins and minerals – energizing and stimulating your body's natural healing abilities.

By giving your digestive system a rest, vital energy normally used to digest food is freed up, allowing that energy to become available for other uses, like cleansing and detoxifying. With all this “free time’, your body will begin to scour for dead cells, toxins, damaged tissues, fatty deposits, etc, all of which are then burned for fuel.

So my cleanse was delivered on Sunday night and they all looked great. As I have signed up for a 5 day cleanse I received my first 2 day cleanses and will receive my last 3 days on Tuesday.
So when I wake up on Monday morning I am feeling really unwell and I think this isn't a great way to start my cleanse. I drank juice one on the way to work on the train. It smells like a fresh salad in a juice, it takes my about an hour to drink it as my body is taking a while to get my head around a salad in a bottle. I am also not a huge fan of cucumber so as this was in my first juice it was a little harder for me to drink.
I got to work and was not well so I had to come home. Not a great start to my cleanse! i had some starch and felt a lot better and have slowly started drinking the rest of my juices. I feel a little weak but not too bad, I know I have food options if I need them and I can stop at any time if it gets to much. The most surprising part is my fiance is looking at the juices and really wants some as he thinks they look really good. So when I do my daily blog I will write at the end and let you know how I'm feeling.

Good Shampoo and Conditioner and why you need to spend the extra cash for it.

So after yesterdays serious blog ( Thanks for all the private message guys of people who have been in the same boat) I thought I would discuss about the importance of using good shampoo and conditioner. Now for people who have only met me in recent years and have only known me working in education it may shock you to know that I was a hairdresser and beautician before I decided to go down the road of education. I loved being a hairdresser and one of the most common questions I would get asked is salon quality shampoo and conditioner really worth the extra cash. The simple answer to this is yes and not because I use to get commission on sales back then. I’ll tell you why most stuff that is sold in your super market is made from the stuff we wash our dishes with the only difference between the two is that you have more fragrance in them and a small amount of conditioner. Those two extra ingredients are worth about 2c a gallon and your paying roughly $5 more for it in a shampoo bottle. The difference between a salon quality shampoo is the quality of lack of a better word is the detergent that goes into it. Good quality shampoo has a sulphate free detergent in it that is a lot harder to make and so why the cost is more. I am a huge advocate for sulphate free shampoo’s and there is a strong reason why.
CANCER!
Sodium Lauryl Sulfate has been proven to cause cancer. While research on this is still new it is also very damning. You will also find this in nearly every cleaner in your house and those cleaners advise you to wear protective gear when using. For more info please follow link. http://www.healthy-communications.com/slsmostdangerousirritant.html So the way I see this is if we smoke there is a strong possibility we can get cancer, the same applied with shampoo. I don’t know many people who have not lost someone or known someone with cancer so why risk it. Another reason why is that quality shampoo and conditioner is better for the hair and is more cost effective. As it is concentrated you don’t need as much shampoo and conditioner for your hair. The other thing people are not informed about is washing your hair. I would say 90% of people I speak to have no idea how to wash their hair. Seriously, so here is shampoo 101. When you shampoo your hair you need to was it twice, not once twice and here is why, the active ingredients in shampoo are designed to clean the hair. So when we do the first shampoo the shampoo opens up the cuticle on our hair (look at above image). This is little fish scales that our on the outside of our hair so when we wash them the first time they all open up.
This shampoo is not designed to clean the hair just to get the cuticle open so once we do this we rinse and repeat with a second shampoo, this goes inside the cuticle and starts cleaning out all the dirt, oil and hair product on our hair. So when I see people putting golf ball size shampoo in their hands to do one shampoo I nearly die as you should only use the size of a 10 cent piece on both shampoo’s.

So what the conditioners job then? It’s to go in and close our cuticle back up again and smooth our hair out. Now contrary to popular belief for people who leave their conditioner for as long as possible to moisturise their hair, conditioner closes the cuticle within 3 seconds. Once it’s shut conditioner will stop working so there is no need to stand in the shower for ages and waste water. Also my other big problem with cheap shampoo and conditioner is that in contains silicone. Silicone is what give your hair that nice feeling that makes it feel soft but it’s artificial and not a reflection of your true hairs condition. I also hate this from a colourist point of view as it makes colouring hair a bugger to do. When you continually use this stuff it builds up on your hair and forms a nice little barrier so when your hairdresser goes to colour it the colour may not always turn out. The colour has to try brake through the build up of silicone and if this takes 10 minutes you have lost 10 minutes of processing time so the colour may be lighter than expected.

So my final point on good shampoos and conditioners are you spend good money to get your hair coloured so look after it or you might as well go buy yourself some washing up detergent and use that instead.

The Decisions We Make And The Support We Get.

As I mentioned in my original post a few years ago I boarder lined with a eating disorder and I wanted to talk about some things that I felt played a small part in me heading down this road.
When I first made the decision that I wanted to lose some weight I was met with a whole tonne of negativity. How many of you reading this have been met with the same thing when you have said you wanted to lose some weight too? I'm guessing here but I may say a few. I remember speaking to a girl I was working with and she had notice my eating habits had changed a dramatic amount and had asked why. (Remember in my first blog I was consuming 4 coffees a day and a tonne of coke!)
I very shyly told her I was trying to lose weight. She thought about this for a moment and responded with why? I had to think for a second. I had never been asked why only had been told that you look fine you don't need to lose weight and so on and so on. Sounding familiar?
My response way clean and simple "I am not comfortable at this weight" and then I had a reaction that I have never had before and have yet to have again. She turned to me and said if that's what you need to do to be comfortable than so be it. She was very understanding of what I was doing and even researched into some weight loss techniques for me. It seems strange to me that people are willing to throw their support behind us for everything under the sun except for our weight unless we are overweight.
For example: I want a new job, people will offer up there support to look around for you and do what they can to help you achieve this. I have even had people help me with my resume when I have applied for new positions. Or if I’m getting married, here let me help you find venues or churches and Oh I know a great florist. Why is it we can support people in these type of things but when it comes to something like my weight people put their walls up and say no.

Because of this response I became very secretive about my diet and exercise. I simply felt like no one could understand or help me through it. Now I'm not saying if I had more support that I wouldn't have gone down that road but I may not have been pumping myself full of laxatives and energy tablets to make me go harder at the gym (I do not recommend this to anyone and I’m amazed that my digestive track is still in one piece) but I may have been able to say to someone I need help and have them tell me to pull my head. It all came to a head one night that I was sitting in bed with my now fiancé and was sick and not wanting to eat any rice from our Thai. I ended up completely breaking down from starving myself and restricting what I was eating. I was lucky that he was there for me and has been since.

The reason I chose to write about this so early on is as I mentioned I'm getting married soon. So what does every bride want? To look amazing in their wedding day. For me there is a few kg I would like to lose, now keeping in mind of what I have written I'm asking that you don't pass judgement and firmly remember that we all need to feel comfortable in our own skin. I am not looking at losing an extraordinary amount of weight just a few kg. So what steps am I taking to make it different this time? I'm putting it out there for the world to know for starters and doing it right this time. So I have enlisted a personal trainer to help tone me up and have looked into ways to lose these few kg in a healthy manner. The option I have decided is the best for me is called Urban Remedy Cleanse. I will go more in depth on the weekend as I will give you a rundown of how it all works. So some have you may seen that I have put there link on my status update on Facebook. Well the responses I got were of the negative nature. No surprise there but as I said I am doing it right this time. I have been lucky enough to meet with someone in the company and have had it very properly explained to me. (As I said more details to come) So it's the choice I have made and it the choice I would like people to respect, I have made the conscious decisions that on my blog I will only talk of things that I have tried, known or had personal experience in no assumptions, no I read it on the Internet so it must be true talk. So when I see people making assumptions it gets me a little frustrated. I understand the people who are writing this stuff say it cause they love me and say it cause they read some information about cleansing so all cleanses must be the same. But as I said we all need to support one another in whatever we do.

Whether its weight loss or job hunting it's the people around us are the people we rely on the most for the support we get on the decisions we make. So I ask when someone tells you they want to lose weight or want to change something about themselves, be honest if you don't agree that's fine but let offer your support cause you may never know when you will need it back.

Group Fitness

I was talking to a client last night about what my gym routine was and this is what it sounds like

Mondays – Personal Trainer
Tuesday – Free Weights and Cardio
Wednesday – Body Attack
Thursday – Spin
Friday – Free Weights and Cardio
Saturday - Boxing

I received a response that I am very much use too, “Classes! Why on earth do you attend classes? It much more beneficial to do more free weights and blah, blah, blah”. Now I have heard this all before from many a trainer and they all raise some valid points on this such as technique- if you’re not right in front of the mirror you don’t know if you’re doing it right. Or set up - how much weights to use or how to set up a bike correctly. My response to this is there are plenty of meat heads in front of the mirrors in the free weights area who still do it wrong and people on bikes in the cardio section who’s bikes don’t work. As for technique I know a man who runs solely on his toes and doesn’t use his whole foot when he runs. I don’t see any personal trainer going up to any of these people and offering free advice to assist them in their training, nor is this their job.

So this got me thinking, why do I incorporate classes into my weekly routine and these are the answers I can think of. Firstly I am a morning trainer, people look at me very strangely when I say I’m up at 5am to run to the gym and do a class or exercise, as I said I am up at 5am! Now I don’t know about you but the old brain doesn’t really join the party until at least 6:30am. So going to a class allows me to exercise without really thinking about what I’m doing and I have someone who tells me exactly what do and keeps me to an hour time slot that I’m out the door by 7am and not stuffing around. I also think it’s exercise! I do this because it better than nothing right? I know people who don’t do any exercise at all and they condemn me on doing classes.

It’s also the people who are in there with me. I was thinking this morning as I was standing there that I like my classes cause of the people I do it with. For example on my right this morning there is a lady who’s daughter got engaged the same time I did and we have been exchanging wedding planning stories and recommending each other to various places for wedding stuff. On my left is one of my clients fiancé who tells me about her wedding plans to my client as trying to get them out of him is like pulling teeth, his words to me once where I’m just responsible for showing up in a suit and my fiancé is doing the rest. I think this is a very wise choice as when I met this man he was sporting a very attractive mullet and this was 3 years ago. Behind me was another one of my clients who I met through the gym who I adore and love hearing about her son who has just been accepted into the New Zealand army, this was a huge process and I have loved hearing about it. These are just to name a few, these people are my friends and I only get to see them at 6am in a class, I have only made one connection like that on the gym floor and that is with my now best friend Corrine, she is as crazy as I am.
I also love my instructors! They are all different in their own way and that’s why I love them. For people who do Body Attack this is not an easy class and most people say people who do Body Attack are slightly insane,. I totally agree with this, it’s hard there is jumping running and really weird choreographed moves, oh did I mention that I have a 65 year old in my class who kicks my ass in this class? One thing we both agree on is we heavily rely on our instructors to get us through our classes.
This morning I had Andrew who I adore for a few reasons, Andrew is an inspiration he was once overweight and has lost a lot of it through going to the gym and is now and instructor, he also drives nearly an hour to get to teach us on a Wednesday morning and he’s fun. He makes me laugh so much that I forget about the amount of pain I’m in.
I then have the ever amazing Ryan who is my Sunday Step teacher when I can get myself out of bed to attend. Ryan is amazing in the fact he learns most people’s name is the class, gives them a kiss when they walk through then gym doors and manages to dance while he steps. He also constantly is looking for old material to keep us on our toes and take the time to explain each track and what it involves.
And finally Amanda, I am partial to Amanda as she is now my personal trainer but I will write a whole blog on her at a later date. The thing I love about Amanda is she tough she pushes you to you limit and call you on your bullshit. If you do one of her pump or spin classes she tells you to turn the red knob up or tells you to squat lower and god forbid you beat her to the top when raising from a squat before her as she will make you doing it again. I like this as it pushes me harder and pulls me out of my comfort zone and I’m not alone. All her classes are usually jam packed and you struggle to get a bike or a pump set if you’re not in early. She also does walk around the class to check how were going and move us if we need it.

And finally for people who think that it’s not a good work out, I hate to break it to you but people do just go to the gym to exercise not to lose weight or to bulk up just to get there heart pumping a little faster and like me have made a few friends out of it.

To Botox or Not to Botox

So I figure if I’m going to blog I better be truthful. Hi my name is Danielle Banister and I’m 26 years old and I have Botox.
There I said it, wasn’t so hard did I add I was 24 when I started?

Now the question you may ask yourself is why would a 24 year old get botox? All I can answer is for is why the 24 year old me got Botox.
Simply really a the frown lines and crow’s feet that had taken up residence on my face. I had noticed over time that I had slowly gotten these from years of being in a constant frown (you need to meet my old boss to understand) that I had many of a line on my face and I wasn’t super happy about it but in my head I would be 40 when I would have had botox done, this is not the case
I have been having laser hair removal for a few months and had gone in for a routine appointment with my therapist I remember looking at her and thinking god you look amazing so I asked have you been away you look really good,
Her response was what day is it? I said Friday “oh she says no it’s been 5 days since I have had my botox” Now I would like to add my therapist is 12 months younger than me and is a nurse
So I enquired into why she is getting botox done as she is young and beautiful and doesn’t need it (of course she doesn’t I’m looking at the final product) she then goes to explain that the muscles in our face are like the muscle in our body, we do weights we run for miles to make our muscles and body look a certain way, this applies to our face too.
Now we can’t exactly put a dumbbell on our forehead and start raising our eyebrows to strengthen the muscles in our face can we, instead we frown and laugh to shape our face have small amounts of botox put in our face freezes the muscles to stop these lines from becoming deep and set in and train the muscles to not become so indented.
Now I don’t know about you but me I’m not down with these line on my forehead and by no means do I want to look like Jocelyn Wildenstein but I would like these lines to be a little less obvious, so I asked can I do it so I can still have movement in my face and have facial expression to which my therapist explain of course.
Women who hit 40 and decide to go for botox have 40 years of wrinkles to banish, they get so pumped up with it they lose all expression and end up with a terrible looking face they don’t listen to their doctor/nurse.
Me on the other hand did I made my appointment and came back in 3 weeks to be prodded and probed if you will. A rule to botox, no drinking within 48 hours prior or post botox, SO NO GETTING SMASHED! Before we started a photo was taken on my face with me pulling all funny facial expressions so my therapist knew where to prod and probe then my face was marked with a little black marker into the places that needed botox injected and finally my face was iced down to numb the pain. WARNING! Botox Hurts! I won’t sugar coat it you are being stabbed in the face with a needle. My forehead was only slightly numb for about half an hour or so but all the pain subsided. It took about 7 days for the botox to take effect but I was very happy with how it went. People did comment that I was “looking well” I only need to have this done once every 6 months or so. For $300 I think it’s totally worth the investment.